Jello Biafra Changes Name Amidst Cosby Controversy, Now Cleveland Indians Biafra

SAN FRANCISCO, CA– The artist formerly known as Jello Biafra has announced today that he will no longer use the moniker “Jello” and will now be calling himself “Cleveland Indians” Biafra following the very public and controversial court battle waged by a number of women that were sexually assaulted by Bill Cosby, a comedian closely associated with the popular foodstuff.

In a recent interview with Rolling Stone, Biafra tried to distance himself from the now fallen star.

“When I chose the name Jello I thought that it was as wholesome as you could get,” said the lead singer of popular punk band The Dead Kennedys. “I never would have chosen the name if I knew it would some day make me a controversial figure.”

Some believe that the name change is a clear indication that Biafra has sold out. One fan, Mark Christiansen, said, “I don’t know, it all seems sort of cowardly to me. Like, you’re going to stick with the name Jello through all of the good times and abandon it once things start getting rough? Jello needs you now more than it ever did before and you’re just leaving them bleeding in the street to die. Seems pretty messed up to me, man.”

Many fans went on record to say that they grew up loving Biafra not for his music or political commentary, but because his name reminded them of their favorite desert and they feel wholly abandoned by the artist.

“I always thought the name was supposed to be inflammatory, like Marilyn Manson or Wolf Blitzer. Now that he’s changed it to Cleveland Indians Biafra I just don’t what I’m going to listen to 30 years ago.” said former drummer of Sum 41 Mary Pederson.

The name change will surely upset many fans of Biafra’s past works but Biafra is hopeful that it willsnag a few Cleveland Indians fans to make up for it.

“I was so sick and tired of people asking me what I thought of Cosby everywhere I went. I just want to have played my music 30 years ago in peace, you know? I want to live a normal life.” said Biafra before entering the second limo that arrived shortly after the second decoy limo departed.

Time will tell whether the name will stick or if fans will become accustomed to it but we have the feeling this won’t be the last we hear from Cleveland Indians Biafra.